Some people carry great ability within them, yet never take flight in their whole lives. What holds them back usually lies not outside, but in how they see themselves. This essay names the six cocoons of self-limiting belief, and suggests the light that helps you move beyond each limit.
A spaceship held by six chains
Picture a spaceship ready to fly into space: fully fueled, engines in perfect order. Yet it stays still on the launch pad, because it is held by six chains. Every person is the same. We have all the potential we need; we are simply held by cocoons in our awareness.
The good news is that these chains are made of awareness, so when our awareness changes, they dissolve on their own.
The six cocoons
1. Seeing ourselves as small
We think we are just an ordinary person with no great mission. In truth, everyone comes into this life with a mission of their own — whether it is raising a kind child or cooking warm family meals.
The light that opens it: recognize your own worth and mission.
2. Fear of failure
Afraid of getting it wrong, we choose not to begin. But if we never begin, we will certainly never arrive.
The light that opens it: see every attempt that does not yet succeed as a lesson, one step closer to the goal.
3. Fear of criticism
The hardest criticism to hear often comes from the people who love us most. They worry about us, so they may believe what we have chosen is impossible. Afraid of their words, we hesitate to speak up.
The light that opens it: quietly sow the right causes. When the fruit you wished for appears, the criticism dissolves, and your loved ones become your supporters.
4. Lack of conditions
We wait until we have enough money, enough time, enough help before we begin. But conditions usually appear after we act, not before.
The light that opens it: begin with what you have. As you walk, favorable conditions gradually arrive.
5. Lack of understanding
Not knowing where to start or how to do it, we easily lose heart.
The light that opens it: learn. Understanding is something anyone can build, one page, one teacher at a time.
6. Lack of vision for the future
This is the root cocoon. When we cannot see clearly who we want to become, the other five cocoons easily hold us back. When our vision of the future is bright and clear, our mission appears, our fears shrink, and we go looking for the conditions and understanding we need.
The light that opens it: paint a picture of your future that is concrete and full of inspiration.
Open the cocoon of vision, and the other five loosen on their own.
Begin with vision
Of the six cocoons, if you choose only one to begin with, choose vision. A person who knows clearly where they are going will find their own way past fear, and will seek out the understanding and conditions they need — like the boat with a captain in the Principle of Flow: the captain is our vision.
How vision opened my other cocoons
Of the six cocoons, I have many times not dared to begin something out of fear of failure and fear of criticism. As a child, I avoided joining school performances because I was afraid I would not sing well and would hear unkind comments. A little older, I was afraid to write job applications, fearing I would not be accepted. Older still, facing things I loved, like writing and technology, I hesitated to pursue them because I feared I had no talent for success.
When I decided to create Chuyện Bên Mâm Cơm, I remembered my Teacher’s words: “People need knowledge.” Humanity’s most precious knowledge needs to be received and carried forward. The more civilized society becomes and the more life develops, the more people need understanding to live with steadiness.
And so Chuyện Bên Mâm Cơm was born, without waiting for me to become someone first. I could begin as an ordinary person, learning to be diligent and to help bring value to life. One more reader of an essay is one more small success; there is no such thing as failure. Nor do I hesitate to learn as I go and keep improving, so that people will see the good the project wishes to bring to the community and join hands to make the results greater. It was my vision — that books and knowledge are gifts that always walk with human life — that helped me break through the other cocoons and give myself the chance to begin.
Practice for today
- What worth of my own am I underestimating?
- If I knew for certain I could not fail, what would I begin?
- Which criticism is holding me back, and which fruit I wish for would answer it?
- With what I have now, what is the smallest step I can take today?
- What do I need to learn, and from whom?
- Five years from now, who do I want to be?
Reflection question: Which cocoon, if opened today, would help me fly the farthest?
Frequently asked questions
What are self-limiting beliefs?
They are limits we place on ourselves through the way we see ourselves and life. They are not the truth; they are cocoons that can be opened.
Why is vision for the future the root cocoon?
Because vision gives us a reason to move beyond the other five. Without vision, it is easy to choose to stay still for safety.
How should I face criticism from loved ones?
Understand that they criticize because they worry about you. Rather than arguing, quietly sow the right causes. A good result is the gentlest answer.
Do I need a big change to move beyond my limits?
No. You only need to change your awareness, little by little. When your awareness changes, the limits dissolve on their own.
This essay is an English rendering of the original Vietnamese article on Chuyện Bên Mâm Cơm.